The best version of you: the version of you that adds most value to yourself, to people around you, and to the world, isn’t necessarily the nicest version of you.
Look, growing up we were all taught to be nice, myself included.
Sometimes the need to be nice has been ingrained so deeply within us that we lose track of all the other parts of us.
Yes… all the other parts of us.
We all have many different personalities within us, and that’s absolutely normal.
(That’s the reason why sometimes we have internal conflict… Right? When one part of us wants something another part of us doesn’t.)
There’s an angel inside, as well as a devil.
There’s an organised person, and there’s a messy person inside of you.
Well, guess what?
There’s a bitch inside of you too, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
In fact, the more you hide the bitch inside, the more it will one day come out in a very pathological way.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t want you to be nice… it’s that I want you to know that you are so much MORE than just a nice person.
Being nice has it’s value in certain contexts. But it’s certainly not every context.
To be truly valuable, you would have to tap into all the different parts of you.
And yes, sometimes being a bitch adds value too.
(How? How could being a bitch add value? I’ll leave this one for you to figure out!)
You see, there’s a huge difference between focusing on being nice, and adding value.
Being nice is for yourself.
It’s to keep your image as that nice person, which is essentially for you.
Adding value to other people on the other hand, is inherently for others.
You’re thinking of them and what they would possibly need.
Sometimes being nice can add value, sometimes it doesn’t.
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But if you want to live your life as a high value woman, you need to learn to add value to those around you.
And in order to do that, you’d need to tap into different parts of yourself.
Because value to him, may not be value to them, may not be value to those over there.
So to add value to different people, you would need to understand what is value to them and what part of you can deliver that value.
Perhaps this shall be the start of you exploring all the different parts of you.
The parts of you that you have neglected.
The parts of you that you have forgotten about.
The parts of you you’ve pushed down for so many years.
The parts of you that you feel shameful about.
The good news is… all the answers are inside of you right now.
What are you waiting for?
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David is the founder of Commitment Triggers & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with his wife Renee at The Feminine Woman, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
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My Mom taught me that there is nothing wrong with being a bitch when necessary. She always used to say bitch stands for , “Boys, I’m taking control here”
Love this!! ?… valuing your guidance here, as always, D.Shen.
ShenWade, rocks ??
I am a nice person but sometimes people take advantage
How can I be nice and let people know that I will not tolerate disrespect. I am nice to others and I deserve to be treated the same way
So if you see someone actions and you feel that they don’t appreciate you and treat you well
I have to let them go from my life right?